Crack Fiction Kingdom Hearts Key Keepers StarWars
by Ramen.Princess21
Summary: Mez and Sora go to the darkside to find out Tashlee's Secret  CrackFiction


Crack Fic. Star Wars.

**WE DO NOT OWN KINGDOM HEARTS OR THE CHARACTERS THIS INCLUDES FINAL FANTASY.  
>IF WE DID THEY WOULD BE LIVING IN OUR CLOSETS o.o<br>MEZ AND TASH ARE OUR OWN CREATIONS.  
>PLEASE READ AND REVIEW.<strong>

The circular room was hollowed out in the center with just enough room around the edge for a walking space and was heavily shadowed a faint outline of a cloaked figured knelled on the edge of the circular space, metal walls glimmered as a projection came up floating from the empty hole.

"Dark." Spoke the Projection of Xehanort.

"Yes, Master?" The cloaked figured lifted his head as he spoke breathing audibly.

"Rise."

Faintly the 'Imperial Death March' played in the background as Dark rose to his feet and began to walk down the metal hall his boots clanked against the floor as he strode.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN HERE!" Tash stared wide eyed at the sight before her when she walked in the room.

The stage lights went to full, lighting the area and the music stopped. Everyone was quite. Xehanort who still was on the projection as a big head, coughed uneasily looking for anywhere else to be as Dark stood there embarrassed.

"Well?" She put her hands on her hips waiting for an answer.

"Hey sorry we're late fellas, Sora had trouble getting on his costume and-" Said Mickey as he walked in with Sora and Mez following behind him, but was interrupted when he saw Tash glaring at the trio.

"Uh oh." Was all they could say and started backing up.

"Does anyone mind explaining what's going on!" Tash backed them into a corner and Mez stepped forward.

"Well I am Obi wan, Sora is Luke Skywalker and King Mickey is Yoda" she said with a smile then pointed over to the set "Then over there is Dark he's Darth Vader and Xehanort is the Sith lord."

"Well thank you Sherlock Holms-"

"No, I am Obi wan." Said Mez correcting Tash

"I don't care who you are!"

"Now see that hurts my feelings."

"Oh lord,"

"No Xehanort is the Sith Lord, I am Obi wan."

"GAH!" Tash threw her arms in the air "I GIVE UP! YOU ALL ARE GEEKS!"

"I take that offensively you know!" Said Sora who was currently in a Light saber fight with King Mickey; Mickey jumped up into the Air and hit Sora's Light saber out of his hands causing it to slide across the floor and wagged his finger at Sora.

"The force is weak in this one."

"I stand corrected…you all are mega-geeks." Said Tashlee as she shook her head and walked towards the door. As Riku walked in also in costume. Everyone stared at him with a confused expression.

"Who are you suppose to be?" Asked Dark

"I am Obi2, of course." Answered Riku.

"Um, Riku? There is No Obi2." Said Mez walking up to him. Riku pouted like a small child.

"Is too!"

"Really now? So who's your father? Darth Vader?" Said Dark butting in.

"No, of course not… Obi wan is." Riku responded looking proud

"Gasp!" Mez stared at Riku "I AM YOUR FATHER!"

"WHAT? NOOOOOOO!" and with that Riku passed out.

"My boyfriend is my son…" she said holding her head confused "And I am a man? Wow, you think I would have noticed in the shower…" Said Mez walking off to the corner to curl up in a ball and twitch. Tash laughed quietly to herself and headed to her room.

_**Later**_

"Hey Mez?" Sora broke the silence when he and Mez were sitting while waiting for Riku to wake up.

"What is it Sora?" Mez looked up from fanning Riku trying to get him so air.

"Didn't you think it was weird how Tash was acting towards the star wars thing?" he questioned.

"How do you mean?"

"It was like she seemed to follow what we were saying, but just didn't say anything" Sora put his hand to his chin in thought.

"What are you implying my dear fellow?"

"I think that Tash is an undercover star wars geek!" Sora exclaimed striking a pose.

"No…"

"Yes."

"No…"

"Yes."

"No…."

"Si."

"I think I would know if my sister was a star wars geek…" Said Mez crossing her arms over her chest.

"Everyone has secrets."

"Well what makes a star wars geek? Let's try and find proof and then we can come to a solid conclusion if she is or not."

"Well, every star wars geek has at least one poster hanging up in their room. Oh! And they can do a flawless impression of Darth Vader's famous scene: '_Luke*Crruuuhhh* I am your Father! *Cruuuuuhhhh Cruuuuu*' _" Quoted Sora perfectly.

"Well I don't think if she was trying to hide it she would slip up on the saying it."

"What about the poster?"

"How would I know? I've never been in her room." Sora looked dumbfounded.

"She's your sister….and you've never been in her room?"

"HEY! It's not my fault she's a demon if you try and go in there! Her room is an obis! If you live through that then, she will surely kill you herself!"

"We will see about that…" Said Sora with a gleam in his eye. Sora then stood and headed down the hallway to Tash's room and knocked on her door. She opened it just far enough so her head was the only thing seen.

"Hey Sora," She said with a smile. "Done playing Lame Skywalker?" Sora shook off the insult and tried looking in her room over her head while talking.

"Luke Skywalker…" Sora corrected her with a glare and then remembered the mission "Yea, after Riku passed out it sorta lost its flare…" He tried jumping up to look in but it was too dark. "I just wanted to see what you were up to and see if you wanted to talk in your room?"

"Sora, are you feeling okay? You're acting kinda funny…"

"Funny? Funny? I am not funny? How would I be acting funny it's not like I wanna look in your room or anything." said Sora laughing nervously. Tash glared before she gathered her heart light in her hand around her fist and knocking Sora down the hall back to Mez.

"Didn't let you in did she?" said Mez already knowing the answer. Sora whipped his lip checking for blood.

"No, but I did discover that she has a very good right hook. But no worries I have another plan!"

"Well I've got nothing else better to do, so this should be fun."

Mez and Sora reappeared in full black body suits.

"So what exactly is this grand plan of yours?" Said Mez as she checked herself out in the outfit. Sora produced some schematics from a pocket on his gadget belt and un-rolled them on the floor pointing as he talked to certain areas.

"Okay, We un-screw the vent here and where I crawl through the shaft twelve feet in while you wait out here on look out and then push open the vent to Tash's room drop in and open the door letting you in." Sora stood trying to look heroic as he put on his night vision goggles "Let's do this."

And thus they began the plan. Sora crawled through the ventilation, pushed open the vent and lowered himself down only to see Mez already there through his night vision.

"How did you get in here!" Said Sora shocked

"I used the door…"

"Oh…." Sora pouted "So much for my plans…"

"Anyways help me find a light switch." Said Mez running her hands along the wall feeling. "Wait I think I found it."

Mez flipped on the light and nearly died of a heart attack. They both stared in disbelief; the room was covered wall to wall in star wars pictures and posters, shelves filled with action figures and novelty items.

"Oh…"

"My…"

"God…" Mez completed the sentence and began to walk around. Tash even had a bed spread dedicated to the obsession.

"Mez check this out!" said Sora as he went over to Tashlee's computer.

"Sora, maybe we should leave…I mean we already came in here but going through her computer? I think that's a little far."

"I am not going through it she left the web page open and you're not gonna want to leave without knowing this."

Mez strolled over to the computer and looked over Sora's shoulder to see the most popular star wars fan site pulled up.

"So she's a fan member? Kind of guessed that by looking at her room…."

"That's not what I am talking about…" Said Sora as he pointed on the screen to her Rank and Name.

PRESIDENT- SKYWALKER_ANIKAN

They both gasped allowed. Not only was she a star wars geek…she was their president…

"Wait…you mean my sister is the legendary SKYWALKER_ANIKAN? The person who has guided us through the toughest of all inter-galactic tragedy and beyond!"

"Yes."

The voice came from behind them, they turned to see Tash fuming in the doorway; her heart light powers surging and licking her skin like flames.

"You. Are. In. My. Room." She growled stalking towards them as if they were prey.

"We knew you were hiding something, and now we know who you really are Tashlee…Or should I say SKYWALKER_ANIKAN!"

"DUN NA NA NA!" said Mez backing Sora.

"Not helping Mez."

"Right, sorry."

"Yes…now you know my most dark secret…" Said Tash becoming dramatic "I am the true ruler of star wars sites and merchandise."

"Wow. And you called us mega-geeks?" Questioned Sora puzzlingly.

"I prefer the term 'Super Ultimate Star Wars Fanatic Extraordinaire' Or S.U.S.W.F.E for short." Tashlee responded nodding in correction.

"Well now your secret is out sisters!" Declared Mez.

"What is it you want…?" Tashlee narrowed her eyes. Sora and Mez looked at each other and formed a huddle.

"What is it we want?" whispered Mez

"Hmmmm…Pie sounds good…"

"THIS IS TOO BIG OF THING TO WASTE ON PIE SORA!"

"Oh right sorry…um…how about we ask for…um…"

"What about we ask her to …." Mez whispered in Sora's ear her demands.

"Oh that's good…. That's real good." Sora said as they broke the huddle.

"These are our demands…." Said Mez with an evil grin as Tash gulped audibly.

Mez and Sora were sitting in the living room watching television.

"I am thirsty Mez, you want anything?"

"Nah I am good."

"Ok, OHHHHH TASHLEE!" Sang Sora as he rang the bell at his side. Tash appeared from the other room; her hair was done up like princess lea's and was forced to wear a maids outfit.

"You rang your most awesomeness?" She said in a deathly sweet voice.

"Yes I am thirsty and require a beverage." Sora held back his laughter as he spoke thoroughly enjoying this.

"Will that be all my lords?" Tashlee's glare was like daggers though her lips had a smile.

"Actually I would like some grapes." Mez spoke up acting like royalty.

"I will be back with your refreshments."

Tashlee returned moments later with a trey containing grapes and a mountain dew for Sora. She handed him his drink and he stared at it grimly.

"Is something wrong?"

"Where is my straw?" he asked sternly.

"You didn't ask for one."

"OH SO NOW I HAVE TO ASK FOR A STRAW! WHERE IS GOOD HELP WHEN YOU NEED IT?" Sora threw a mini tantrum causing Mez to laugh. Tash went to raise her fist to nail him in the face but was stopped.

"Na uh uh Tash, remember our agreement?" Said Mez with a smirk. Tashlee curled her lips up into a scary smile.

"I apologize sir…I will go get you a straw." Tash came back with the straw and licked both ends in front of him before putting it in Sora's drink. "Enjoy."

"Oh Tash!" Mez spoke. "I wish to be fed grapes."

Tashlee's eye twitched. "You gotta be kidding me."Mez shook her head no, and Tash reluctantly lifted the plate of grapes and plucked one off of the vine. "Say 'Aw' "

As Mez did so Tash shoved the whole handful of grapes into Mez's mouth.

"THAT'S IT I QUIT!" Tash's hands lit up like fire and began to attack Sora.

"NOW TASHLEE DON'T DO SOMETHING RASH!" Said Sora as he began to run down the street with Tashlee hot on his heels.

"MUH HA HA HA HA~!"

**Read and Review!**


End file.
